Wednesday, December 26, 2012

Christmas is over.....

Well Christmas is officially over and I dont have any plans or parties on the horizon the next week, even for New Years.  I have to work all week (not weekends). My children are with me for New Years so we will do something kid friendly.   We are invited to a kid friendly party but I dont even want to go... right now I think staying home might be the plan.

After 5 days of no alcohol last week, I had 3 days of lots.  Two big shin digs on Saturday the 22nd that left me with one of those nasty hangovers.  Sunday I had a Bloody Mary at lunch to help kick the Hair of the Dog.  Nope, didnt help.  I think I had a headache off and on for 2 days.  Xmas Eve I had plenty of wine and on Xmas Day I had  more wine.  I paid for it.  My stomach has been on fire.... between the sugar, wine and junk food, my body is not happy. Today, I am staying away from sugar and the rest of week I'm pledging no wine ( or any alcohol) either. 

January 2, I am starting a Whole 30 Clean Food Challenge to get my body back on track, which includes no alcohol. I need it.  I have done this challenge before.  Some friends are doing it with me so I have a good support group.  Not only do I know I need to kick the alcohol habit, I see that sugar is my problem also.  This past month when I started drinking more again, I started to eat more sugar and processed foods. 

So its time to focus on my health, physically and mentally.  I would love to say I am going alcohol free in 2013. Am I weak? Am I afraid to commit or admit I may have a problem?  I finally realized I have been using alcohol to cope with stress, my feelings etc.  I can't believe I was in such a fog the last two years.  Do I just need a good therapist?  Do I just want moderation to be my answer, oh wait, I have been trying moderation. 

So I guess I'm just going to stay in limbo for a while until I make a commitment and a decision and stick with it.  Someone blogged about or recently told me, dont take too much on.  Just focus on something little.  So I will.  January I will officially start my challenge, eat clean whole foods and NO alcohol.  Get back into my work out routine. 

That's the plan.... one day at a time.

Momma Bee


Friday, December 21, 2012

The Plan....

I stuck to my plan.... No drinks tonight.  My son and I had a nice dinner with a friend and her son.  It was nice to chat with her...we don't get to see each other often.  Came home, finished Xmas cards and watched some TV.  So nice to have 5 days straight of no alcohol.

In October I had 3 weeks straight... My goal for 2013 is a lot more days of no alcohol.  Jan 2 starts my 30 day Whole 30 Clean Food Challenge.... Not sure which will be harder, wine or sugar?

I'm looking forward to a Healthier 2013, both mentally and physically!

First up tomorrow, hitting the gym then lots of cleaning!

Off to bed, looking forward to a good nights sleep!

Momma Bee

Holiday Weekend is Here....

After I left work yesterday, I did a few errands for Xmas and I pondered buying a bottle of wine.  I didn't.  Instead , I counted in my head how many days in a row I had of no alcohol.  I was working on Day 4.  While wrapping presents last night w/ my son I thought to myself, I would have drank the whole bottle if I bought one.  Wonder how bad my wrappings  would of looked?  When we were done, kids went up to bed, I sat down, my back was sore, and I thought I deserve a lil reward for all I did tonight.  I had something to make a mixed drink.   I resisted and glad I did.  I went to bed at 11 and woke two times after some strange dreams.  I bagged the gym this morning and enjoyed the extra hour of sleep. 

It will be a long weekend of parties, celebrations and the crazy family is coming to town. I have plans to hit the gym tomorrow morning, so I will stay away from the wine tonight, that is the plan anyway. 

Why don't I always have the will-power to stick to the plan?

Happy Friday to all!

Momma Bee

Thursday, December 20, 2012

Back to old habits.....

December is here and I am falling back into my old habits.  I drank 11/19 days in December.  November was 9/30 days and October was 2/31 days......... Notice a pattern? I'm close to drinking daily again.  I dont want to be that person anymore. 

Who keeps track?  Just people who wonder if they have a drinking problem.

January 1, friends are doing a Whole 30 Clean Eating Challenge.  Which means I pledge to be alcohol (and sugar)  FREE for 30 days.

Now to just get thru the holidays with out over indulging and focus on my health.

Momma B.