I am going to make an effort to post daily..... even if it is short and just checking in.
Last night I had dinner out with 8 girlfriends. Fun dinner and some of us even had our cards read by the Psychic @ the Restaurant. The Psychic was why we planned a girls night out. No, I did not (out of fear) ask the psychic about drinking or addictions but I did wonder if she would mention it. I did ask about my health and my cards read I would have a healthy life. I left it at that ;-) (She was dead on some things for me and some of the other ladies too, very spooky!)
Anyway......So, I was the only one not drinking. Momma B always drinks. The wine was even on special for 1/2 off a bottle! One friend in the group already knew I have decided not drink for a while. Of course it was brought up twice. Really, she didn't have any wine was asked when we were ordering dessert. Why aren't you drinking? I assured them I was fine, not pregnant and not dying of any diseases and I was just having seltzer tonight. Everyone else was drinking wine and I was the only one ordering coffee. I haven't done that in years, wine goes with dessert~ lol I just didn't want the issue pressed anymore and it was dropped. The big reason I wanted it dropped is that 3 of the ladies in this group, along w/ our spouses and significant others are vacationing in February at an all inclusive tropical resort with no children in tow. There are 5 couples going this year. Last year my bf and I went also. Everyone drinks. Good Lord we didn't even have all our luggage at the airport and we were ordering drinks. I drank and ate my face off last year. So bad I think when I came home I was still had liquor in my blood for days. When I step on that plane in February, I will be on day 102 of my challenge..... Yes I already counted it out. I am trying NOT to think about my upcoming trip. Will I drink at 100 days? Will I drink just for the vacation and go sober again when I come home? Can I survive this vacation sober when everyone else starts drinking before noon? Its FREE, an all inclusive resort, how can I not drink??
I'm trying to NOT think that far ahead. Don't drink today, don't drink this weekend. My first goal was making it thru the first weekend. Then to 21 days (my longest streak) and now my goal is 30 days. I want to, I need to make it to 100 days. Don't get me wrong my goal is 100 days and beyond. I have taken the oath that I will not pick up that first drink. I will cry, yell, scream, walk, sleep, run, read, hide and do anything I can to keep Wolfie at arms length and out of my sober zone.
I hope when I hit 75+ days of not drinking it won't even be an thought or an option in my brain to stop my sober car from rolling along this nice scenic route!
So much for a short note to just check in~